ASHEVILLE, N.C. - You can call her CutoutDissection.com, Cutout for short, but just don't call her Jennifer. The former Jennifer Thornburg — now legally CutoutDissection.com — wanted to do something real to protest animal dissections in schools. The 19-year-old's new name is also the Web address for an anti-dissection page of the site for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, where she is interning.
PETA is out of control. I am fine when they have Pamela Anderson and Playboy Playmates naked on billboards, calling for people not to eat meat. In fact, I laugh every time I see them--after I stare at the pictures, hoping for a little nipple slippage, of course--because if they are able to convert just 1% of the population, that means more meat for me and all my carnivorous friends. There isn't anything better than a gigantice piece of veal parmesan gracing my dinner plate.
But I draw the line when these whacko's convert an innocent high school student. Besides this being the worst name since Tiny Tim (I bet his wife went to sleep "satisfied" every night), they have forever corrupted this young and innocent mind. She ought to quit her internship today, and get back to doing more worthwhile high school activities.
She needs to forget about an internship at PETA and start worrying about who is going to ask her to the prom. Unless the guy believes a naked PETA model will accompany her, she won't be getting asked. No guy wants have anything on his mind other than getting that prom dress off. It's as American as apple pie. Boy asks girl to prom. Girl gets all excited and buys dress. Boy makes bet with his friends on which one of them will score first. Boy loses his chance to get laid when girl starts preaching to him about all the pretty animals innocently slaughtered every day.
Mark my words, this chick will be boiling bunnies on every ex boyfriend's stove. Besides, instead of an internship, doesn't she have some cheerleading and sleeping with the quarterback to do?
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